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What’s your grandparenting style?
“If I’d known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I’d have had them first.” ~Lois Wyse About three years ago, I was thrilled to add “Grandma” to my resume. But I couldn’t help but wonder: Had my childcare skills gotten rusty? What makes a good grandparent? I understood the fine line between hovering and supporting — and I wasn’t sure how to get it right. After doing a little research, I learned there are five key styles of grandparenting. That’s the topic of my new column in The Oakland Press. To read it online, please click here. Or you’ll find it here in the May issue of Vitality…
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Hearts of stone?
“Whatever you want emotionally, you have to start giving away.” ~Mary Karr, memoirist According to Dr. Lindsay Jernigan, a clinical psychologist quoted on PsychCentral.com, the term “emotionally unavailable” refers to individuals who are “not comfortable feeling their own emotions, sharing emotions with others, or being present and responsive to someone else’s emotions.” Emotionally unavailable people don’t wear their hearts on their sleeves. We might describe them as prickly, distant, aloof, or unapproachable. And that doesn’t mean they’re unworthy of our affection — but they’re probably not the first ones we reach for when we need a dose of comfort. We all know a few folks who qualify as emotionally unavailable…
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Are you really listening?
“It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Have you ever noticed that some people are always thinking about what they want to say next — and not fully listening to you? In the age of constant chatter, listening is an unsung, unspoken skill. Talking, after all, is only half of a great conversation. Attentive listeners pay close attention; they don’t try to hijack or dominate a topic. Skilled listeners ask thoughtful follow-up questions after you’ve had your say, and even remember details that you’ve shared in previous conversations. Careful listening leads to healthier relationships and a…
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There’s a word for it
“When we love someone, we share things with words. We share poems. We share songs. We share our favorite books. Because if we can make enough language bridges between the two of us, our hearts and minds will begin to know each other better.” ~Martha Beck Cleaning out my desk last week, I ran across several folders stuffed with old greeting cards, notes, and letters. Some were from friends and family. There were Mother’s Day tributes from my son, letters of comfort sent after my mother died, Valentines from my husband, thank-you notes from friends. Another file contained encouraging letters from readers of my early newspaper columns — some typed,…