• approval seeking,  Facebook,  Personal growth,  Self-confidence

    Looking within or without?

    “I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time.” ~Anna Freud, psychoanalyst and daughter of Sigmund Freud The world of social media revolves around building our brand, getting “likes,” and attracting followers. In other words, it’s fueled on the concept of earning validation and applause from the outside. Or, look at it this way: Nobody uses a social media platform without hoping to attract or amuse an audience, even a small one. It’s not a solo activity. As any psychiatrist would tell us, there’s nothing fundamentally wrong with that. We can keep social media in a healthy perspective…

  • Adventure and exploration,  Change and challenge

    Setting sail

    “A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” ~John A. Shedd  Sometimes it’s wise to put safety first — such as crossing the street in rush-hour traffic. Likewise, we should check the expiration labels on our food, wash our hands frequently, and never share personal information with strangers on the phone. Playing it safe isn’t such a bad thing — unless we get so complacent (or agoraphobic) that we rarely leave our own harbor. Earlier this week, a friend told me that pandemic isolation nearly turned her into a social loner. She got a little too cozy staying home, she said, so she’s…

  • Events & news,  Generosity,  Gratitude,  Health & wellbeing

    Why helpers are luckier

    “You can get everything in life you want — if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” ~Zig Ziglar The phrase “paying it forward” — helping others without expecting anything in return — is practically a cliche now. But there’s something to it. I’ve discovered over the years that whenever I do nice things for others (or help them out of a bind) my life magically improves, too. Helping other people adds to our own happiness, opens new doors, and even improves our health and wellbeing. In other words, generosity may look altruistic but it’s actually self-serving — in a good way. Life isn’t a competition.…

  • Community spirit,  Friendship and relationship advice

    Deep roots

    “True friendship withstands time, distance, and silence.” ~Isabel Allende During my recent bout with COVID-19, I had to cancel all social plans until I recovered. Being in isolation for nearly a month was hard, but I was cheered by the “check-in” messages from friends and neighbors who worried about Doug and me. Sometimes I took car rides while in quarantine — just for a change of scenery. Driving back home through my neighborhood, I got to thinking about all the friendships I have within blocks of my home — friendships that have grown richer through shared history and experience for more than 30 years. Even when I don’t see these…

  • Change and challenge,  Community spirit

    Small changes

    “Few of us will have the greatness to bend history itself, but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of all those acts will be written the history of this generation.” ~John F. Kennedy Are you paralyzed by the notion that you’d have to make a huge effort in order to make the changes you’d like to see? Yes, it’s so much easier to snack in front of the TV while we criticize the current state of affairs or complain about everything that’s wrong in the world. But as John F. Kennedy reminded us, each of us has a sphere of…

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