Civility and manners,  Friendship and relationship advice

The whole cookie

“Every healthy relationship is a feast of affection and giving for both people; not one receiving crumbs and trying to convince themselves it’s enough.” ~Shannon Thomas

It’s nearly impossible to be part of an extended family or any type of social group without experiencing a few relationships that are off-balance in some way. You know you’re in a one-sided relationship if you’re consistently making efforts for another person but getting only “crumbs” in return.

Balanced relationships make us feel seen, nurtured, and supported. They’re built on a level foundation of giving and taking. As today’s quote suggests, we’ll have more of these relationships if we offer our loving care and full attention to others whenever possible — the whole cookie.

For some well-researched advice on how to build richer, healthier relationships, I recommend How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen, by David Brooks. If everyone would read this book, I swear we’d all have stronger, healthier relationships. It offers a solution for a politicized society that is driven by fragmentation, hostility, and misunderstanding. Watch for my review on it soon. ~CL

Throughout my career, I've worked as a book production editor, travel magazine editor, features writer, and weekly newspaper columnist. My award-winning lifestyles features and essays have appeared in many national magazines and anthologies, including Newsweek, Reader's Digest, The Christian Science Monitor, Writer's Digest, Victoria, Better Homes & Gardens, Bella Grace, and more. My weekly Sunday "Life Lines" column ran for 14 years in The Daily Tribune (Royal Oak, MI) and won a First Place (Local Columns) award from the Michigan Press Association. My essay collection, Writing Home, includes 93 previously published columns and essays focusing on parenthood and family life.

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