Grief and loss
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When life feels too short
Yesterday I attended the visitation for a neighbor’s husband, a man whose life ended too soon following an illness. The funeral home was crowded with family, old neighbors and friends. Other neighbors who’d known Jim for decades — whose children grew up with his — had many good stories and memories to share. Sadly, I learned more about him after he died than I did when he lived a few blocks away from me. Isn’t that the way it often goes? We’ve had too much bad news in our wonderful neighborhood (and our world) lately. And if we’re not mindful, it’s easy to get pulled under by the long, slow…
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How to comfort a grieving friend
“If you’re my age, you’ve probably had your heart broken many times. So it’s not that difficult to unpack a bit of grief from some little corner of your heart and cry over it.” ~Emma Thompson Losing our parents and other loved ones is a reality of life as we age — a reality that’s easier to face if we have a nurturing support system. But sometimes it’s hard to know how to help and comfort friends who are grieving a new loss. That’s the topic of my newest column in The Sunday Oakland Press. You’ll find it in the Homefront section in the print edition (July 2) or you…
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Goodbye to Mom’s house
“No matter how far we’ve come, our parents are always in us.” ~ Brad Meltzer Even after we’ve grown up and moved on, the homes of our parents still hold many of our family memories and stories. If you’ve lost both of your parents, you know that the process of selling their last home — and the things they’ve accumulated — is one of the toughest parts of the grieving process. Yet it can be therapeutic, too. My latest column in The Sunday Oakland Press Homefront section addresses this bittersweet topic. You’ll find it in the Sunday print edition tomorrow (March 5) or you can read it online here. ~CL
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Where the light enters
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.” ~Rumi I spend a lot of time thinking about the quotes I post here each morning. First, I hope they’re thought-provoking, informative, or useful to you in some way. Many of you have emailed to tell me you want a dose of positivity to jumpstart your day, so I try to honor that request whenever possible. At the same time, I think it’s important to consider whether or not each quote or sentiment is in sync with the news of the day or the cultural climate. After the war in Ukraine began, after the school shooting in Oxford, and after…
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Those who comfort us
“Do not believe that the person who is trying to offer you solace lives his life effortlessly among the simple and quiet words that might occasionally comfort you. His life also is filled with much hardship and sadness….But if it were otherwise, he could never have found these words.” ~Rainer Maria Rilke in Letters on Life When we were kids, our parents and grandparents were the superheroes who chased monsters out of our closets and kept us safe. We didn’t realize, until we grew up, that our all-powerful folks were human beings who had their own worries and demons to battle. It’s tempting to assume that the people we always rely on…