social skills
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Deep listening
“How often do you offer your undivided attention to others? Do you inquire into how they’re doing, what’s happening in their world, or what they need to feel safe and happy? Or are you quick to talk about yourself and see how others might serve you?” ~John Amodeo, PhD One of the hallmarks of a great conversationalist is the ability to listen. Ideally, when someone asks what you’ve been up to lately, you hope they’ll pay attention to your answer and ask follow-up questions. Too often lately, most people seem eager to shut you up, derail your topic, and reroute the conversation back to themselves. How often have you walked…
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Listening skills
“One of the benchmarks of great communicators is their ability to listen — not just to what’s being said, but to what’s not being said as well. They listen between the lines.” ~ Laurie Buchanan, author I’ve always been interested in how communication works — or doesn’t work — in our daily lives. Good listening skills are as essential to healthy relationships as good talk. Thankfully, I’m married to a guy who’s an outstanding, empathetic listener. (That’s him in the background of the photo above.) More often than not, however, I notice that other people are so focused on what they want to say next that they aren’t really listening to…
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Can you walk in someone else’s shoes?
“We are sun and moon, dear friend; we are sea and land. It is not our purpose to become each other. It is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is: each the other’s opposite and complement.” ~Hermann Hesse, Narcissus and Goldmund In popular culture, we talk a lot about the importance of honoring our differences and celebrating our uniqueness. We want others to appreciate our flaws and quirks — or at least accept them — and respect our opposing points of view. We want the freedom to worship as we choose, the freedom to express ourselves, the freedom to choose our…
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Traditions to count on
“Traditions underscore our relationship to a greater whole. Then, instead of being isolated in time and space, we’re engaged with our clan or community, even with humanity as a whole….Once an activity achieves tradition status, it’s dependable. You can count on it. In a world of diminishing dependability, this is precious indeed.” ~Victoria Moran, Younger by the Day There’s comfort in having rituals and traditions, small or large. It doesn’t matter which holiday we’re talking about — it’s the special activities you count on that make it a celebration. Every year in the fall, for instance, I look forward to hosting a Halloween costume party for a group of neighborhood…
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Silly presents
“A friendship can weather most things, and it can thrive in thin soil. But it needs a little mulch of notes and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often, just to save it from drying out completely.” ~Pamela Brown A few years ago, after a painful surgery on my eyelid for skin cancer, a dear friend brought me a lovely “care package” that touched my heart more than words could express. I’ll never forget the morning she showed up at my door with that gift. That same friend was injured in an accident earlier this week, and as soon as I learned about it, I started shopping for a care package.…
