approval seeking
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Whose approval do you need?
“I must work harder to achieve my goal of not seeking approval from those whose approval I’m not even sure is important to me.” ~Lauren Graham, American actress Some folks are hungry for attention from virtual strangers on social media. There’s nothing wrong with sharing our gifts or viewpoints with a wider audience. But once in a while, it’s healthy to step back and take a closer look at our motivation for doing so. It’s worth asking yourself whose approval or attention you’re seeking — and why it’s important to you. Are you spending more time trying to impress people you’ve never met? Are you investing the same amount of…
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People pleasing
“I can’t give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: Try to please everybody all the time.” ~ Herbert Bayard Swope, American journalist One of the gifts of aging is the realization that we can’t please everyone. The journalist who’s famous for today’s quote understood that achieving success often involves taking risks. Whether we’re creating a piece of art or expressing an idea in print, we risk upsetting others if we rattle the status quo or challenge a tribal norm. Born in 1882, Herbert Bayard Swope was a famous war correspondent and editor of the New York World. He was the first journalist…
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Who are you, really?
“You are what you are when nobody is looking.” ~Abigail Van Buren Today’s quote invites us to think about authenticity. It’s human nature to present our best image in public, but being truly authentic takes self-reflection and courage. That’s not so easy. Consider all the photo-shopped selfies and stage-managed lifestyles that are posted daily on social media platforms. Once in a while, it’s worth doing a reality check: Who are you when nobody’s looking? ~CL
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Second helpings
“That thing that you are obsessing about — no one else is obsessing about it with the same intensity as you are. People are thinking about themselves. Remember that, and move through your day.” ~Gretchen Hydo Ages ago, I had a college room mate who was too shy to get back in line for second helpings at meal time. She worried that other students in the cafeteria would judge her for overindulging. Enabler that I was, I often returned to the line to fetch a second omelette or slice of chocolate cake for her. As today’s quote reminds us, other people are usually preoccupied with their own thoughts and their…
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No comparison
“When you are content to be yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.” ~Lao Tzu Ours is a culture of competition. We have televised sports 24/7 — not to mention countless game shows, dancing and singing competitions, and cooking and baking contests. Whatever you like to do, there’s probably a trophy for it. There’s another team to conquer; another score to beat. To be your best, you gotta top somebody else. It’s all fun and games, of course — unless we take it too seriously. Comparing and competing can be toxic. If we’re constantly trying to outperform someone else, we might lose track of what makes each…
