approval seeking
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Are you feeling stuck?
“You will either step forward into growth, or you will step backward into safety.” ~Abraham Maslow This is the time of year when we’re likely to feel stagnant. The calendar tells us it’s spring, but the weather isn’t convinced yet — and we’d rather not dig in the garden until it’s warmer outside. Feeling stuck isn’t just a symptom of cabin fever; it can sneak up on you anywhere, any time of the year. For starters, you’re stuck when you keep making the same recipes for dinner because you’re too tired to find new ones. Maybe you’re feeling stuck at home but can’t summon the motivation to make plans with…
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You be you
“The beauty of us lies in our vulnerability, our complex emotions, and our authentic imperfections. When we embrace who we are and decide to be authentic, instead of who we think others want us to be, we open ourselves up to real relationships, real happiness, and real success.” ~Marc & Angel Hack Life Some readers would never get caught browsing in the “self-help” section. It’s a lot cooler, after all, to tell people you’re reading the last of Thoreau’s essays or Shakespeare’s comedies while you’re finishing a good mystery novel. But I promise there’s some beneficial self-help material out there, in books and online. If, like me, you find that…
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People pleasing
“I can’t give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: Try to please everybody all the time.” ~ Herbert Bayard Swope, American journalist One of the gifts of aging is the realization that (1) you can’t please everyone and (2) you shouldn’t try to please everyone. The journalist who’s famous for today’s quote understood that achieving anything of great value often involves taking big risks and subjecting yourself to criticism. More often than not, you’re bound to upset others when you rattle the status quo or defend a point of view. Born in 1882, Herbert Bayard Swope was a famous war correspondent…
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Got enemies?
“You have enemies? Why, it is the story of everyone who has done a great deed or created a new idea. It is the cloud which thunders around everything that shines. Fame must have enemies, as light must have gnats. Do not bother yourself about it. Keep your mind serene as you keep your life clear.” ~Victor Hugo There’s another similar quote that’s often misattributed to Winston Churchill. It goes something like this: “If you have enemies, that’s good. It means you stand for something.” The point is, popularity is overrated. If you’re living authentically, it’s nearly impossible to be loved by everyone all the time. But if you’re still…
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Deep thoughts, tough questions
“To find yourself, think for yourself.” ~Socrates The simplest truths are rarely as simple as they seem. Today’s quote from the philosopher Socrates is a case in point. “Thinking for yourself” gets tricky when you’re under the influence of family and friends, popular culture, cable news, and social media. There’s always a cacophony of voices sharing different views on everything from business to fashion to politics. You can try to find the courage to go deeper. Then you have to ask yourself some tough questions: Am I following my own heart or trying to fit in? Am I rebelling against something or living authentically on my own terms? How and…
