approval seeking
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Putting yourself last?
“Sometimes you have to put your own needs first, even if that doesn’t please others. You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.” ~Shannon Olson Like a lot of people who know better, I still tend to put the needs or wishes of others before my own. Even if someone lets me off the hook and gives me “permission” to put myself first, I might feel a bit guilty when I do so. It gets tricky sometimes, because I truly enjoy helping others. Somewhere between selflessness and selfishness is a healthy balance. One thing I know for sure is this: When I set myself…
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Whose life?
“Whose life are you living, yours or the one somebody prefers for you?” ~Vanita Oelschlager, Write with Me By the time we reach middle age, we’ve established patterns, preferences, routines, and habits. We’ve made some difficult choices; traveled a few paths; tried a few different things. We want to believe we’ve ultimately crafted our own way of living — including the place we call home and how we choose our meals. In reality, each of us is a unique combination of influences — parents, siblings, partners, relatives, teachers, peers, and popular culture … just for starters. Who are your strongest influences? Which ones suggested, or even dictated, the life you’re…
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Whose approval do you need?
“I must work harder to achieve my goal of not seeking approval from those whose approval I’m not even sure is important to me.” ~Lauren Graham, American actress Being a people-pleaser is exhausting. When I was younger, I spent a lot of time trying to impress my parents, my teachers, the cool kids at school, and every authority figure I was told to “respect” without question. In retrospect, I wish I had some of that time back. These days, people go to incredible lengths to get attention from virtual strangers on social media. Sometimes I’m embarrassed for them. As today’s quote suggests, it’s worth asking ourselves why we’re “seeking approval”…
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Who are you, really?
“You are what you are when nobody is looking.” ~Abigail Van Buren Today’s quote is all about authenticity — a common theme in many “Dear Abby” columns. It’s human nature to present our best image in public, but being truly authentic requires honest self-reflection and courage. That’s not so easy, especially today. Just for starters, consider all the edited selfies and photos of stage-managed lifestyles that constantly bombard us on social media platforms. Once in a while, it’s worth doing a reality check. Who are we when nobody’s looking? ~CL For more like this: Check out additional posts and new content on the Life Lines home page. Photo: Frederik Meijer…
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The dog ate your homework?
“When you blame others, you give up your power to change.” ~Dr. Robert Anthony, Beyond Positive Thinking It wasn’t my fault …. She made me do it …. I was raised by dysfunctional parents …. Someone gave me bad advice …. The dog ate my homework. When we make a mess of things or miss the mark, it’s tempting to reach for an easy excuse. We might try to save face by placing the blame on someone else — or outside circumstances — even when we know, deep down, that we were responsible for our own mistakes. In today’s quote, psychologist Robert Anthony shines a light on the blame game.…
