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What does that remark say about you?
“Words are the clothing of our thoughts.” ~Jonathan Swift Human beings aren’t born knowing how to filter unkind thoughts. Children are notorious for expressing brutally frank opinions on everything they notice, from bad breath to obesity. But if we’re lucky enough to grow up among responsible adults, we learn some basic social skills — including civility, tact, and diplomacy. These days, too many adults think it’s fine to blurt whatever pops into their heads. Political leaders, in particular, have mastered the craft of the blatant insult. If speech is the “clothing of our thoughts,” as today’s quote suggests, it follows that boasting, name-calling, and crude remarks all reflect the character…
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Confiding
“But oh! the blessing it is to have a friend to whom one can speak fearlessly on any subject; with whom one’s deepest as well as one’s most foolish thoughts come out simply and safely.” ~Dinah Craik, British novelist It’s always wise to weigh our words carefully before we speak. We don’t want to spread harmful gossip or betray a confidence. We don’t want hurt or offend anyone. And given today’s volatile political climate, most of us avoid discussing hot-button topics when we’re unsure of someone else’s viewpoints. That said, I’m deeply grateful for trusted friends with whom I can speak “fearlessly” on any subject. As today’s quote suggests, we…
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Second helpings
“That thing that you are obsessing about — no one else is obsessing about it with the same intensity as you are. People are thinking about themselves. Remember that, and move through your day.” ~Gretchen Hydo Ages ago, I had a college room mate who was too shy to get back in line for second helpings at meal time. She worried that other students in the cafeteria would judge her for overindulging. Enabler that I was, I often returned to the line to fetch a second omelette or slice of chocolate cake for her. As today’s quote reminds us, other people are usually preoccupied with their own thoughts and their…
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Let it bloom by itself
“Don’t try to force anything. Let life be a deep let-go. God opens millions of flowers every day without forcing their buds.” ~Osho Control freaks, take note: The act of letting go is an act of courage that requires trust and faith. It’s not our job to keep the earth spinning on its axis — and isn’t that a relief? Sometimes letting go means stepping back and allowing others to make their own decisions (or mistakes) despite our well-intended guidance. It can be frightening to loosen your grip on a difficult situation. But no matter how hard you try to force or manipulate an outcome, things have a way of…
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An invitation
“A real conversation always contains an invitation. You are inviting another person to reveal herself or himself to you, to tell you who they are or what they want.” ~David Whyte I love the way poet David Whyte reminds us that “real conversation” invites an honest exchange between people. But thanks in part to social media platforms, we often talk at each other — mostly about ourselves and our own interests. Every real conversation is an opportunity to learn something new about another person. When was the last time you were invited to share something about yourself? And how often do you ask others how they’re doing … and pause…
