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Shining
“Never dull your shine for somebody else.” ~Tyra Banks “I don’t want to look as if I’m trying too hard,” a friend said when she was choosing an outfit for a special event. I believe she meant that she wanted to look natural, or comfortable, not over the top. But I know several people who share the same concern — and they won’t even wear a costume to a Halloween party. It takes self-confidence and courage to stand apart from the crowd. If you’re always worried about what others think, you’re probably afraid to take risks. I’m a bit suspicious of calculated nonchalance — or pretending that you didn’t “try…
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Identity crisis?
“The reward for conformity is that everyone likes you but yourself.” ~Rita Mae Brown High school kids typically work hard to fit in with their peer groups. Even the non-conformists dress like the other non-conformists. One of the gifts of aging is feeling comfortable with yourself. You develop your own style, making choices that reflect your taste and character in everything you do. You don’t have to follow trends because you trust your own creative ideas. Maturity is all about discovering yourself, not figuring out how to impress — or fit in with others. ~CL If you enjoy “Life Lines,” please share the site with your friends.
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Enough is good enough
“Healthy striving is self-focused: “How can I improve?” Perfectionism is other-focused: “What will they think?” ~ Brené Brown Raised by a perfectionist mother, I learned the perils of perfectionism early on. I set impossibly high standards for myself — even if someone else didn’t. Even when I accomplished something worthwhile, I never believed it was truly good enough. Taming this crippling perfectionism has been a lifelong mission, and I’ve written about it here. That’s why I was drawn to a new guide, How to Be Enough: Seven Life-Changing Steps for Self-Critics, Overthinkers, and Perfectionists, by Elle Hendrickson. And that’s why I chose it to be our November selection for the Blair Memorial Library’s Self-Help Book Club in Clawson. This book is…
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Putting yourself last?
“Sometimes you have to put your own needs first, even if that doesn’t please others. You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.” ~Shannon Olson When I was younger, I often placed the needs and wishes of others before my own — even in matters as simple as choosing where to go out for dinner. Everyone else, it seemed, had better ideas or bigger problems to solve than I had. Even when I was overbooked with parenting duties or exhausted after caring for an elderly parent, I tried to make time for everyone who asked for it. Maturity has given me permission to put…
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Halloween people
“Some people are born for Halloween, and some are just counting the days until Christmas.” ~Stephen Graham Jones ** Note: Due to a system glitch, my recent Life Lines posts were sent to subscribers without photos. To view photos and posts you’ve missed this week, visit the Life Lines website here. Every year, I eagerly await the start of the spooky season, and usually start decorating on October 1st. For me, Halloween always stirs a cauldron of happy childhood memories — making costumes with my mom and trick-or-treating with my dad. Year later, I walked door-to-door with my own child and his friends on magical Halloween nights. In recent years, my…
