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Are you stuck in stubborn habits?
“I need to take an emotional breath, step back, and remind myself who’s actually in charge of my life.” ~Judith M. Knowlton Are you following patterns or routines that aren’t serving you anymore? Creatures of habit, most of us stay on the same-old beaten path, rarely stepping away from our comfort zone. We keep buying the same brand of coffee, hanging out with the same people, walking the same route with the dog, wearing the same clothes, watching the same news station … or continually putting up with the same disrespectful treatment from others. It’s time to shake things up. Time to hit the reset button and reclaim your personal…
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Love and struggle
“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It’s an active noun, like ‘struggle.'”~Fred Rogers All relationships evolve, change, and reshape themselves. In the early stages, we tend to idealize a new romantic partner as well as our new friends. But eventually we learn that no one can meet our expectations all of the time. The longer we know a person — and the more we grow — the more likely we’ll encounter conflicts and disappointments. Sometimes we’re called to face a crisis together. And sometimes we need extra support to handle a problem of our own. Fragile relationships won’t withstand the challenge — but the durable ones will. As Fred…
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More than words
“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ~Maya Angelou It’s not just what we say that matters — but how we say it. While preparing for an essay workshop, I ran across some notes I’d made about the importance of “voice and tone” in our writing. Since most personal essays are conversational, our job as writers is to draw readers into the heart and soul of our stories. We want others to relate to our experiences. The same is true when we’re talking with someone. Our tone of voice carries our intention, and everything we…
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Communication skills
“Lack of communication leaves fear and doubt.” ~Kellan Lutz Good communication can strengthen any connection. Staying in touch, sharing how we feel, and expressing interest in the lives of others can go a long way toward building solid relationships. I’m an over-communicator by nature and by trade. After college, I had jobs that required meetings and follow-up phone calls. Later, as a newspaper columnist, my career was all about talking to people in print. (Early in my marriage, an in-law told me I “talk too much.”) But after years of living among both chatterboxes and quiet people, I’m usually more comfortable with the chatterboxes. While some folks believe it’s safer…
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No comparison
“When you are content to be yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.” ~Lao Tzu Ours is a culture of competition. We have televised sports 24/7 — not to mention countless game shows, dancing and singing competitions, and cooking and baking contests. Whatever you like to do, there’s probably a trophy for it. There’s another team to conquer; another score to beat. To be your best, you gotta top somebody else. It’s all fun and games, of course — unless we take it too seriously. Comparing and competing can be toxic. If we’re constantly trying to outperform someone else, we might lose track of what makes each…
