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Selfish motives
“Almost every offensive action ever committed can be traced back to a selfish motive. It is a trait we hate in other people but justify in ourselves.” ~Stephen Kendrick Sometimes I catch myself doing things that would annoy me if someone else did the same. Talking too much and forgetting to return borrowed books are just a couple of quick examples. I’m sure my family and close friends would offer a much longer list of aggravating things I do. Just ask. So, today’s quote got me thinking about why we’re slow to recognize our own bad behavior — but quick to notice offending behavior in others. Selfish motives keep us…
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Finding our way back home
“This is the bright home in which I live, this is where I ask my friends to come.” ~David Whyte “Home” is a small but expansive word. What does it really mean to make a home, to feel at home, or to be at home with oneself? At the same time, the buildings we call home reflect who we are, which is why inviting people inside our homes is an intimate gesture that extends beyond basic hospitality. My mother had a gift for creating beautiful homes, and I inherited her appreciation of the domestic arts. In a nursing facility near the end of her life, she was confined to a wheelchair and talked constantly…
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You are legendary
“Don’t be satisfied with stories, or how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.” ~Rumi In our celebrity driven culture, it’s easy to dismiss our own lives as unglamorous or uninteresting. But as the Sufi poet Rumi reminds us in today’s quote, comparing ourselves to others is a waste of precious time. And besides, do all those curated Instagram photos and People feature stories reveal the whole truth of “how things have gone” with others? So do yourself a favor today: Appreciate how far you’ve come. Think of all your gifts and advantages, no matter how small or large. After that, consider everything you’ve done to touch…
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Complainers versus problem-solvers
“When you consistently maintain a positive frame of mind, you’ll become known as a problem-solver rather than a complainer. Mentally healthy people avoid complainers. They seek out problem-solvers.” ~ Joseph Sommerville, PhD, The Five Keys to Interpersonal Success Are you a complainer or a problem-solver? According to behavioral research, if you spend a significant amount of time with complainers and doomsayers, you’re probably sporting a negative attitude, too. When complaining becomes the norm — at home, in the workplace, or in social circles — it’s hard to break the pattern. Negativity is as contagious as it is demoralizing. As renowned psychologist Susan Albers puts it, complaining is like a virus. It…
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Bad manners and social graces
“Sometimes, to have good manners means putting up with other people’s bad manners.” ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr. American author Emily Post advised that having good manners isn’t just a matter of using a dinner napkin or refraining from passing gas in public. Courtesy, she said, is all about being “sensitive to the feelings of others” and putting them at ease. Civility is another word for kindness in action. A lot of people have complained lately about the general increase in rude, insensitive behavior — on the road, in restaurants, in politics, in grocery stores, and even among friends. If we’re not careful, boorish behavior will become our cultural norm (if…
